Detachment represents a state of mind that is constantly observant of the nature of events and that remains unaffected by them. Once you realise that you can be a witness to the events taking place in your life, your awareness will expand and you will be able to see the reality behind situations. Detachment implies that no matter what is going on in your mind, no matter what you are thinking, rather than identifying with the thinking, you become the detached witness to what is transpiring in the moment. If thinking is happening, allow it to be so. The task is to learn to detach from petty ideas and feelings. In other words, detachment means going beyond delusion and opposites.
Verse 213 of the Dhammapada says, "Emotional ties bring only sadness and fear. Avoid attachment in emotion and you avoid sadness and fear." Once we are attracted to something, then our ego and the possessive quality of our nature is manifested. Detachment on the other hand, involves a state of mind in which you use your discretion and act accordingly. It is not a game of action and reaction but of stimulus and response. 'Involvement' means getting involved with a thought or situation and creating a drama out of it by getting into the why, how and what of it by oscillating between the past and the future, both of which do not exist. The past is dead and gone and the future is yet to be. Do not confuse involvement with attachment. Attachment creates illusions and desires. If a desire is unfulfilled, then what arises is anger. One thing leads to another, and anger leads to confusion. Once that happens one fails to use one's reason. This downward slide stems from a single unfulfilled desire.
Attentiveness means that you are focusing on one thing exclusively, whereas to be aware means to be conscious of the whole.For example, when there are a variety of fruits in a basket and your attention is only on the apple and you do not see anything else; when you look at the stars and do not see the space in which they appear, this is attentiveness, wherein the 'you' or the 'I' is very active. By seeing only the apple and the stars, you have blocked out the rest of the fruits, the basket and the void in which stars appear. Our brain works in such a way that we cannot give attention to something without ignoring something else.
When you see the basket and the space around it as a whole i.e. the basket with all the different fruits - apples, mangoes, bananas etc., then you just 'are'; there is no focused feeling of 'I'. This is awareness. There is a sense of just 'being', you are just 'aware'. In awareness, there is no thought, the 'I' disappears and you are a part of the whole. As soon as you lose awareness, thinking starts and the 'I' steps in, and with that, the ego also returns. Simply put, awareness is inclusive of all that is; attention is exclusive.
If one has any doubts, it is better to wait. Just as love is blind, so is faith. When the soul gets embodied, it enters the state of limitation because it is governed by the law of its karma; whether it be a Guru or a disciple. Once a Guru or anyone is born in the physical body, he will undoubtedly have flaws. So, when you meet your Guru and if you begin to analyse him intellectually as a spiritual, moral or learned person, then you will not get anywhere.
If you judge your Guru with your heart and your feelings rather than your intellect, you will overlook and not recognise the flaws, which not only your Guru but every Guru has or will have. Swami Satyananda Saraswati says that, "If you look for a Guru with your intellect, you are not going to find one because there is no one who can fulfil your intellectual needs. A Guru is not an intellectual need, just as love or marriage is not an intellectual need."